This is the third book in the House of Night series and I’m just going to say it. This is the worst book ever written. I read just over 100 pages, which is over one/third the book and here is what I learned. Zoey makes out with Professor Loren Blake and now has three boyfriends, yet denies being a tramp. Aphrodite replaces Stevie Rae as Earth in the circle.
OK so that might have been a spoiler, but really – this book spoils itself. If I only learned two new things in over 100 pages, then clearly you are just reiterating the same garbage from the first two stories.
The things that are repeated way too many times to count: Stevie Rae is both dead and undead. They can’t just say she’s undead apparently, that’s not enough. It has to be said as dead undead EVERY TIME. We know she died in the second book and we know Neferet changed her into some monster. We get it, but please feel free to tell us a few more times just to be sure. And while you’re at it, please tell us who Zoey’s best friend is. Because I may have forgotten the first 30 times it was stated.
We learned the Cherokee word for daughter, again. We know that Zoey is better off with her grandmother and has a better relationship with her. We know her mom is an idiot who married a religious cult guy AKA the “step-loser” but feel free to write about it all over again.
We know that Heath is a human boyfriend. Boyfriend #2. Zoey imprinted him in the first novel, and again in the second. But sure, I want to hear this story again so why not tell it to me again in the third?
We know there are 5 elements and what they are, but each time you tell us about one you feel the need to mention all the others as well.
Aphrodite fought with her parents in the second novel. You really didn’t need to retell the whole episode in the third novel. If people actually care, they might go back and read.
We know what the formers are. Third Former is the first high school grade (I believe this is Freshman in the states), Fourth Former is the second, etc. So if Eric is a Fifth former then he’s in his third year. If Eric’s roommate Jack is a third former, that means he’s two levels below Eric… I appreciate that you spelled that out though.
Honestly, it’s the most condescending crap I’ve ever read in my life and I had to stop before finishing because I felt I was becoming LESS intelligent. To the authors, here is some advice. The run on sentences, need to be broken down. The parentheses need to go. I started skipping over them entirely and missed nothing.
You can’t take the first novel and rename it – and then tell people it’s the third novel. You’re taking us for fools. Turns out, you don’t need to repeat everything from the previous novels, or the previous chapters for that matter. You’ve said it once, now let it go.
The twins? What the hell is that nonsense? You have two people with one character. That’s boring and uncreative. A side note here, actual twins don’t refer to each other as twins in every sentence, nor do they need to add the same thought to the first sentence. Example, Shaunee doesn’t have to say “agreed, twin” it can just be assumed that she does.
You don’t need to use the following words/phrases ever again – you’ve used them enough already “step-loser, ‘rentals, hag from hell, birthmas, twin”
Figure out your target audience. It says teen fiction but I’m not sure what teen would actually read this without being offended. Anyone above 16 would understand the repetition and likely move on without finishing and without looking back. Anyone under 14 should probably not be reading about blow jobs and sluttyness. So that leaves the 15 year olds. Or maybe those with a learning disability or memory problems. They might like things repeated ten-fold.
This book is so utterly terrible that I absolutely hate the main character. She lies, she cheats, and she treats her friends like dirt. She gets everything but deserves nothing.
I wanted to tear out every single page that annoyed me with repetition and stupidity but each page has so many things that create this wave of hatred, I think it would be physically impossible to tear the pieces to such a tiny degree. I wanted to get out my red pen and start editing but really, that would probably leave us with two pages of story, the rest would be deleted.
I didn’t even want to put my recently purchased book marks in the novel because I didn’t want my bookmarks tainted.
I’m listing all of the ways that this book might be improved in hopes that the authors read and learn for their next novel (or quit writing all together – see parentheses suck). I’ve never wanted to deface a novel so badly, until I picked up this crap.
Do yourself a favour – burn these books.